Now, Now, Don't Cry: Foolishness and the Onion's TV "Segments"

Gymnast Shawn Johnson Put To Sleep After Breaking Leg

I think the wry folks at The Onion will certainly win more Webbies for this: The "Today! Now!" TV-news spoofs. Some of the gut-bustingly funny segments include "Gymnast Shawn Johnson Put to Sleep After Breaking Leg" and "FDA Approves Depressant Drug for the Annoyingly Cheerful." These are not appropriate to watch anywhere where you shouldn't snort. Consider yourself warned: Hiccups are a distinct possibility.

From the just-so-slightly overdone makeup of the show's hostess to the potted dark-red orchids, to the overwrought music, a-bit-too-loud chuckling and dramatic zoom-out camera effects, the resemblances to real TV news coverage are many. So much so that, if you watch these clips on YouTube and venture to read the reader comments, you'll almost feel bad for the viewers who think the clips are real.

For the Shawn Johnson "story," one hapless reader wrote, "is this real? can anyone confirm this? if it is, it really p***** me off!" (sic). The back-and-forth that commenters get into are sometimes entertaining in and of themselves. But all in all, they reveal the pathetic state of media literacy in our country. C'mon people. The extraneous punctuation on "Today! Now!" wasn't a big-enough tip-off?

The amazing use of ex-CNN anchor Bobbie Battista in some of The Onion News Network's breaking-news segments might be one factor adding to the confusion, but overall, the percentage of watchers who get fooled is downright scary. For the sake of our country's future, let's just hope that a lot of those who are fooled are actually trying to fool us into believing they've been duped. One can hope, at least.

Don't Have a Cow: New York Times Art Critic Awestruck by Simpsons Stamps

I've always had a soft spot in my heart for "The Simpsons," and not just because watching it is one of the best ways to improve a crummy day. Likenesses of several landmarks in my Massachusetts hometown have wormed their way into the fabric of Springfield, thanks to Lance Wilder, one of the show's background designers, who grew up a few blocks away from me, and whose mother was our elementary-school music teacher.

Bart's prison-like school on the show is based on my even more suffocating middle school, and the town hall is modeled on the library where I spent so many hours as a kid (because we had no internet in ye olden days). Hometown lore says that Lance pulled three all-nighters in a row during finals week his senior year at the Rhode Island School of Design to create an audition tape that won over "Simpsons" creator Matt Groening, and has been working there ever since.

This May, the Simpsons family was immortalized on 44-cent stamps, and their simple yet evocative artistry have sent New York Times art critic Roberta Smith rhapsodizing over their perfection. While it took three months for her to need stamps badly enough to run to her nearest P.O. and take notice of them, the ordinarily restrained Smith comes close to gushing about these beauts.

You can tell she had a hard time restraining herself, but her prose glows. Among her compliments: Their "peerless expressions" "[project] maximum psychic and visual power" with their "succinct encapsulations of each character" and "extraordinary chromatic wattage." She even compares their artistry to that of Andy Warhol and sculptor Richard Serra (!), and asks, guilelessly, "Really, are these not among the best American stamps ever?"

While I shudder at how the hapless quintet of Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie reflects upon our country, I have to say Smith's criticism dignifies the show and further elevates Mr. Groening's status of cultural genius. Bravo to the show, to Smith, and to the U.S. Postal Service!